First, I apologize for not posting last Thursday. I try to post every week, but, sometimes, as they say, life happens.
Here is a story from late 2003. Younger would have been four years old, and Elder would have been seven and in first grade…
We sent Elder to school to learn. We just didn’t understand everything he would be learning. We knew about the A,B,C’s, we just didn’t know they were Attitude, Belligerence, and Complaining. In the last month or so, I have heard more sentences start with, “Do I look like I know…” than I have ever wanted to hear.
“Elder,” I always respond. “Don’t be sarcastic.”
“I don’t know what that means,” he then complains belligerently. (He has learned his alphabet well.)
“It means hateful. Don’t be hateful.”
So then he mutters, “I don’t know what that means either.”
“What you are doing. Quit doing it.”
But, you know, I guess it’s true what they say about kids learning at home, because the other day, after hours and hours of his Attitude, Belligerence, and Complaining, I heard myself launch, “You know, I would have had a really boring day today, if you all hadn’t added just that little touch of whining and running wild and misbehaving to liven it up a bit. I just gotta tell ya, you have really made my day!”
Elder was silent for a moment. “So, what does that mean? Did you have a good day?”
“Never mind, Elder. It doesn’t matter. Mommy was being sarcastic. And I suppose I shouldn’t have been,” I gritted, my tone far from apologetic.
“That’s all right, Mom,” he told me, helpfully. “We didn’t get it anyway.”
For someone who doesn’t “get it,” he’s becoming a real expert.